Possibly something there between myself and my boyfriends best friend

Blonde Bum — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 11:26:30 GMT

When I met my partner a few years ago I met all his friends and such a laugh with them, we all became friends. A few times one of his closest friends came onto me at parties and stuff and I would always find a polite way of saying that it wouldn't be right and he wouldn't want to hurt his girlfriend either. (He has been dating for a few years also). We get on extremely well and I enjoy being his company. He's fun to be around.

I know we both love our partners or with wouldn't still be with them. Now we all see eachother a lot more often and i've realised just how much I actually have in common with him. Before,when he said things like "ts not fair that I didn't meet you first"and "e were supposed to be together"I always thought he was just plain crazy. but it is frightening how alike we are.

I wouldn't dream for a second of even attempting to start something there, it would be oh so messy but I can't help but think about it when I look at him. ya know, I wonder what things would be like if we had met eachother first. There's is no doubt that there is a sexual attraction there but I have never taken any notice of that, some people just give off those vibes but now I am starting to think like he is and I hate that. To be honest I think he is confusing a sexual attraction for something more.

I don't want this to snowball into something that i really don't want to happen.I love my boyfriend and he makes me very happy. We can't avoid eachother unless my boyfriends stops being his best friend so I really just need to find a way to let it slip my mind and carry on with my life.

Has anyone had a similar situation?

RE: Possibly something there between myself and my boyfriends best friend

Equus — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 12:59:09 GMT

Hi Blonde Bum , After reading this question and your question a few months back where you considering having sex with a guy at the gym , I feel there are problems in your relationship with your Boyfriend . When a woman loves a man she does not have thoughts of being with other men . Something is lacking in your relationship , your needs are not being met therefore you are seeking attention from other men , you are bringing in outside interference in to your relationship . You are committing emotional infidelity . I think you need to take a good look at your relationship and be honest with your BF . If you decide to stay with him you need to tell him what you need from him to be fulfilled . Please don't even consider marriage with this man till you do some soul searching . This friend of his is not the first guy you have had these thoughts about . If your BF is in tune with you as he should be , he's going to sense something to not right and he's correct something is not right . Again if you love him and are happy with him you'd not be having the feelings and thoughts you are having about other men . I wish you the best .

RE: Possibly something there between myself and my boyfriends best friend

Blonde Bum — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 13:40:56 GMT

I completely understand where you are coming from. And I did think that myself. Thats its me and not everyone else. I am not being sexually satisfied lately. I think I posted that before. But I can't bring myself to say it to him. He is aware himself that our sex life is almost non existant at this stage. I am constantly thinking about sex with other men as I do not get it at home. But I never acted upon it. The opportunity has come up a few times over the past few months and I have always turned away and said i'm sorry I have a boyfriend. I don't want to be unfaithful but I do feel unfaithful anyway as I think about it, even though I don't actually do it.

I can't bring myself to tell him that he doesn't satisfy me anymore. It would effect his self esteem which I know he already has issues with. I don't want to embaress him. I've tried to be more spontanious myself regarding sex but to be honest some nights I am raring to go and he is too tired and falls asleep. I am in a serious rut at the moment and can't see a way out. I do love my boyfriend, I just wish our sex could be better.

RE: Possibly something there between myself and my boyfriends best friend

Equus — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 00:25:41 GMT

Hi Blonde Bum , Has your boyfriend seen a DR lately is he healthy , on any medications , under alot of stress on the job ? We as Women turn down flirtatious Men everyday because of the man we love . Good solid relationship must have communication , trust , fidelity and respect . Intimacy is a direct reflection of the state of your relationship . Your needs are not being met , you need to communicate this to your Boyfriend . I am quite concerned that your emotional infidelity will turn to physical infidelity and destroy your relationship if this is not addressed . You can't expect your Boyfriend to do what you want and need if he doesn't know what you want and need . He can't read your mind . Don't approach him in a negative manner by telling him he doesn't satisfy you anymore . Guide him , show him where and how to touch and kiss you to stimulate you mentally , emotionally and physically . Give him the chance to satisfy you again . Take the lead show and tell the Man you love what you want and need from him . You may very well get a pleasant surprise . I wish you both the best .