How do I keep my confidence up when life looks so bleak?

louloubelle — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 15:58:45 GMT

I'm 23 and graduated in a media-related degree in the UK two years ago. After I graduated, I became ill and was unable to work for months. After I recovered, I had to take an admin job to pay off my more immediate debts. Things improved and I met the man of my dreams on Christmas Eve 2008. A few months later, I moved 100 miles away from my friends and family to be with him.

The trouble is that because of the recession I haven't been able to get a job of any description. I've done work experience, I've done post-grad studies in philosophy and I have had several interviews but I've always been pipped to the post by more experienced candidates applying for jobs that are too easy for them. I am frequently complimented on my interview technique and I do get interviews but lose out to older candidates.

I am now finding it hard to keep my confidence up after 4 months of unemployment and my self-worth is completely in the toilet. I'm fed up of living hand-to-mouth but I can't even get rubbish jobs because I'm over-qualified!

How do I stay positive and believe that the kind of job I am educated to do will come along soon? I feel like I'm sinking.

RE: How do I keep my confidence up when life looks so bleak?

Masterflagger — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 16:20:32 GMT

Look around you at the signs of economic unrest with an accepting, comprehending, powerful eye. Don't just sit around ignoring the walls topple around you and hoping they won't land on you. People who are blindly positive when action is called for are fated for a fall somewhere down the line.

Step 2
Remain confident. In a troubled economy, the temptation is to call yourself a failure for things beyond any one person's individual control. Don't do it. You're only human. Keep confident in your abilities to survive, and actively seek to protect yourself and your family.
Step 3
Get into survival mode. The troubled economy is in a shake-up period that does have an end. Until then, your goal is just to hang on. Get prepared to make the sacrifices needed to keep your head above water...and the heads of those who are far more important to you than maintaining your current standard of living.
Step 4
Forget about keeping up with the Joneses. Don't run off and buy that new velvet ottoman in a second color just because you saw a big package being delivered to John Q. Neighbor. Chances are, the Joneses aren't doing as well as you think they are. And it's all too likely that your affluent neighbors and associates are looking at you and thinking your name is Jones, too. Stop the competition. Start surviving.
Step 5
Look to the community. Don't isolate yourself, a too-tempting prospect if you live in a big city. Be there for your neighbors, and don't be ashamed to ask for help in hard times. Anthropologists and archaeologists have long known that humans, as intrinsically social beings, function best when they function as a community...in fact, their survival depends on it.
Step 6
Work proactively to make your situation better. Get out of debt or get your debts under control. If you've been laid off, rethink your career. Make a switch. Consider self-employment. Look for legit work at home opportunities. Stock up. Get a survival kit together. Eat better and sleep well to preserve your health. Spend money on the true necessities. Don't go overboard, but do take realistic stock of the state of the world and protect yourself as much as possible.
Step 7
Be proud of yourself for being a survivor. In troubled economic times, giving up is all too tempting. Don't do it. You're too important. And we humans are well adapted to living in much, much harder times than these.

RE: How do I keep my confidence up when life looks so bleak?

DB Lady — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 16:50:42 GMT

Hi,

Masterflagger gave you an excellent response. One thumb up. I wish I could

give more.

You're not the only one experiencing this kind of frustration. I am a Registered Nurse and this profession is very good and is not affected by recession. If I were you, I will take some classes on Caregiving to start working in ssisted Living and Nursing Homes. When you have more experience, aim at taking more classes as prerequisites for Nursing. It may take you 4 years the most to become an RN. If you already have taken the Prerequisites for the Nursing Program, it may only take you 3 years.

Take care and please don't give up. There's always the calm after the big storm.

I wish you the best. Keep us posted please.

RE: How do I keep my confidence up when life looks so bleak?

kv — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 12:44:06 GMT

Try looking for a job that is not that demanding. You never know what can come of it once they realize your smarts and experience. Keep looking in the field you desire and don't give up. Something WILL come along. I promise you this.

RE: How do I keep my confidence up when life looks so bleak?

Dazzlecat — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 01:51:21 GMT

The first thing you have to do is change your thoughts from negative to positive. the future looks bleak only if you say it does. Try to think about all the positive things. Assume that you will succeed and soon your confidence will start to rise.