Some one help me help her.

levi — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 23:54:38 GMT

the last week of july this year i was reunited with a friend from 27 years ago and i fell for her and she for me. turns out this is a troubled woman. she is a recovering alcoholic (13 months sober) and she has an aversion to sex. she doesn't even like public displays of affection. i love this girl dearly. we had a sweet night together all those years ago. (no sex, just cuddling) and all this time it has enchanted me. she tells me of thinking about me all these years too. when i try to talk to her about the love making (the term i prefer.) she backs out fast and gets an attitude if i push. she says she loves me and i believe her she is a professional woman of 46 and i'm a blue collar type of 42. i have no reason to think she is playing games. i'm the only man in her life besides her father.

i really need some advise i want her to understand that help is available and i'll always support her but the stress is mounting. i love her so. i don't want to loose her.

can anyone help ?

RE: Some one help me help her.

Mr.Jqna — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 00:04:14 GMT

The only thing I can say is to take it slow and see where it goes. Don't expect anything. Don't force your way into her life. Just be there for her as much as she allows you to be. She obviously has some issues in her lif that she may be working on, let her. I was told that women don't want men to fix their problems, just be available when she calls. In time maybe things will be the way you want it to be. Be patient.

RE: Some one help me help her.

DB Lady — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 06:30:46 GMT

Levi,

I don't think you'd like to hear my answer. You said she is a troubled woman, a recovering alcoholic, and has aversion to sex. Life is too complex even without these problems with your partner to be. I would advise you to move on and make your life simple, otherwise you'll regret because you'll end up miserable if you'll stick with her. You could just be a friend to her.

there are other good women out there without too many problems. Life is how you make it.

Take care and good luck.

RE: Some one help me help her.

Catherine — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 07:36:25 GMT

At this point in her life who knows what tragedies has happened to her. So if she if frigid I would imagine she has been sexually assulted at some time in her life. You have to open up communication and build trust so she can confide in you. And believe me it's going to take som therapy for her to have the courage to heal. There is a good book about it and guess what? It's called ' The courage to heal' If she's gutsy enough to look at it and I am correct she will find herself in this book. If you really love her, you will need a lot of patience, If you don't really love her, be her friend and don't push. Hope that helps